Hmm, so my life lately. It's actually really confusing and messed up.
There are some good parts and some bad. It was all turning good, but yea, nothing works well. ;)
I'm really happy at night, but in school I'm all depressed.
The post may seem long, but it's what I'v got to say.
PROS of my life:It's soccer season now :) I'm really glad about that. Like volleyball and basketball I can play, but you kinda need to be.. tall for them sports and being 152cm playing for varsity (small school not enough people to have a JV and V team). heh not so great. BUT soccer you don't need to be a certain height, I'm glad about that.
We played two Beijing schools last saturday, we went there intending to loose both (we were missing our 3 good players ;) just saying), but we won one, lost one. not bad :)
we won 5-1, and lost 1-3. heheh I scored two of them. could have been more if I didn't screw them up. meh, I had so many perfect shots, but o well :) I'm enjoying it much more than last year, cuz our soccer coaches are so nice. they are both semi pros haha but you wouldn't be able to see it by the way we play :D one of them said I was his favourite heheheh which feels so good because our other coach couldn't give a shit about me.
More PROS
I do yearbook after school too. But I'm not like that nerd okay ;) I'm cool.
I'm a photographer yea, and I took this uh-maz-ing photos, it looked like the pro ones on Tumblr.
(not sounding cocky I hope)
And out teacher who's a professional photographer, like his photos are used in newspapers, told me I stand out out of the other students :) I'm really proud. heheh. I'm often told that I can do better, and I don't actually have a specific talent, so it was nice. He said that I'm the quiet one, but he sees talent, and potential :)
I hope I don't prove him wrong :S
CONS:well, there's so much. My boyfriend dumped me the day before Valentine's Day, and we were undecided for a couple weeks after. he said things like :
yea i know i did, i wasn't tryna blame you or nothin, im just saying that i do regret it, and I feel bad for what i did, i truely mean that abby. idk what u feel about any of this or if u liked me to begin wif, so i guess i just want to know if you personally want to give it another try, n if not thats fine, im not tryna presure u into anything
only if you could no how shitty i feel the last couple weeks since we broke up. i miss you so fucking much. i have never felt so crazy about someone.
I'm just like, STFU bitch. If you feel like that then why break up in the first place, and why do you think we can go back that easily... It's been a month since we broke up But the thing that is really shitty is that, we don't talk anymore. We had such a cool relationship like joking around, play fighting, teasing. and now I can't even look at him.
I also found out this other guy liked me, like really into me, then I found out that he stared dating a girl a week after. They broke up cuz she found out that he was embarrassed to be with her and all that. And yesterday he's like "I love you", how stupid so you think I am seriously.
And another guy, I call him Larry, he keeps asking me out and I keep saying no. We dated in 7th grade, and I don't want a repeat. He's nice and all but no. (I can't believe I'm saying this because I probably sound like a complete whore) He blocked me on Skype, soo bad ass -.- he unblocked me we talked for like 5 minutes. then he blocked me again. AND I DONT FUCKING KNOW WHAT I DID WRONG. I hate the feeling of people hating me. It sucks.
ANYWAYS
DH, the guy that I like, hates me now too.
there's loads more, but when it comes to typing it all out, I don't know how to put it into words.
All I can say is that, I often feel like crying.
i painted this for him when we were still together, heheh if he doesn't want it, I want it back ;)
I made another one for another guy, I'll post it sometime, got to admit it's pretty sick ;)
Okay, so you see the picture above. I want to make something out of it. I'll add more to the back ground but for now it's just this.
So i was thinking like a pop art thing, with different colored backgrounds, having four parts.
or
having a tie dye background and just the one ying and yang.
which one do you think?
p.s the photos on my piczo are shit because my cameras shit quality.
-Abby
